IndependentOrDependent/Communicate

http://www.essence.com/2011/11/17/real-talk-tyrese-says-you-need-a-man/

So....Black ...women are in this conversation more than any other race that I know of...That I have read of. You see, Black women do love their Black men, but we have a very big communication problem. Black women would prefer that their man come already trained to help out in the kitchen, help around the house, pick up the kids, contribute, and eventually, marry the woman they have shared a few years with. Instead, we have Black couples divorcing after such a short period of time. Divorcing after a year or two, and all we can ask is, "Why go through with it knowing it's for life, and your not sure?" Eva Longoria married Tony Parker and they divorced, but he did cheat. However, vows do say through thick and thin. I'm not saying forgive him right away, but he has to know he did wrong, pay for it, and find a way to gain your trust back. For celebrities its worse. Now a days the B-ball players just want to have fun, they don't care if they are married or not. The wives know what they are getting into. It's all about the money in the end. Whether they fight the press about it for years, we know money is the reason most B-ball players find those wives who just want access into clubs, booze, and to be flown all over the world wearing hideous looking clothes they think are gorgeous. But the real deal is within our own people. A good Black woman will show her man she appreciates him. But the Black man needs to stop being pampered 24/7 and pamper her back. Your wife does NOT replace your mother. You need to get that out if your head. Be the man, you have a job to, and its more than to just bring home the bacon. Dating outside the race has always been a problem, but now the topic is just out of hand. Movies such as "Something New" Which showed that no matter how for you are for your own man, he could be successful, gorgeous, have it all, but he could be boring as anything and just want to be at home and work. That is boring. So she went for the White guy because he made her laugh, smile, and was outgoing. People stared, and whispered, but who cares???????? Why do us girls, Black girls care so much about what people think about us? Do they pay your bills? They are just jealous because you found a good man who will honor you for life. Nobody else matters except for the people you pick. Family will always support you even if they do not like the choice you make. It's their job to stand behind you because in the end, all family want is for you to be happy.

Now I kinda went a bit off track, so to come back to my title...Women have leaned on men for decades until we were given rights to vote, work, and do other things. Now, we want to be independent, bu the man wants us to lean on him. It can get messy but if you just sit and talk things out with your spouse, it's not as hard as you make it out to be. Honesty is a good policy. If you do not learn to trust in you relationship, you will struggle with everything else and life is too short. Let him spoil you, let him treat you, no harm in that. But talk about things in a calm and respectful manner without yelling and trying to hurt each other.
Loving is so important yet this world would rather us kill each other. Let's not do that. Treasure life, communicate in a decent manner, and learn to be open, kind, and respectful.

Signed:
GyftedArtyst

BlessedBeyondBelief/YetBodyBreakingDown

As grateful as I am for the fact that four companies want to hire me, the process literally had me almost asleep at the wheel the past few days. I had four job interviews in two days. Three women's stores want to hire me by the end of the week...I have been job hunting for the past nine months so I am grateful for the positive outcomes happening now, but it's been a toll on the body. What do I do?? (in shock, face in hands).  The past few days had me thinking to myself, we spend so much time trying to impress people, give the right answers, find the right job, spending hours doing so many things that by the time we are done, our body shuts down and that is not good. It is required that we get 8 hours of sleep so out body can rest, relax, cleanse from the day, and re-energize in order to be fresh and enthusiastic for the next day. Why not sleep, and work all night? If it doesn't get done, tell your boss to go somewhere (seriously, you are only human) If he thinks you can perform miracles in an eight hour work day he must think he hired superman. We only have on superman...You have 24 hours in a day. Nobody should get up at 6am, to be at work for 8, to get off at either 5 or 6 to get home soo late you either just see your kids going down for bed, or you arrive in time for supper, barely letting yourself relax before you work on other things. Life has just made us soooo busy. And the worst part is the holidays. Every holiday we over due ourselves. Thanksgiving, you hae to buy all the ingredients. Christmas, that is the most expensive time of year. One night, oh so funny, my parents had gone to Sobeys and had bought a whole bunch of groceries, only to find out that we had no space in our trunk because it was filled with, lol kinda gross but funny, garbage. haha so he had to ask a stafff member to help him unload his garbage to fit in his groceries, My dad just wanted to make sure the food got home. He' a funny guy, and only means well. He just wants a nice home for his kids to live in but he forgot to get rid of the stuff he through out.
ANYWAY...
So yeah, no matter how busy you are, NEVER let work, other activities, even your kids or your friends convince you that you need to be so busy. Take a day off, go to the spa, go see a funny movie, go have a drink, even if you have never had alcohol, go check out an art gallery and enjoy some beautiful artwork. Do something other than what you normally do...Give yourself a break.
This might sound like, but I have had one of those days where I just felt like my body was glued to my bed...Not for sleep, but because moving and walking became so hard that I could barely make a phone call...Be kind to your body, eat right, sleep, exercise, drink fluids, life is too short, so be nice to your body.

Signed:
GyftedArtyst

SixWeeks

So just under a week ago, I decided to go through a trial and error phase for 6 weeks to change things up a bit and see if I can turn some results around. Not saying I did not before, I like trying new things and being different and being bold, but I have decided to give 100% in order to receive 100%. This includes more time with God, time with family and friends, sharing things that matter, changing my wardrobe, I will be 25 in just under three months and I felt a change was due. Why wait until next year? So for the rest of the year, my goal is to dress fab wherever I go, try new styles, new shades of make-up, earrings, go harder on the job hunting, which by the way, has made for some good progress. I booked three interviews, well four, but I already had one. Three for Wed, and I am feeling pretty good about each of them. It's for the holidays. So I have been doing my homework, doing my research about each job. I am working on my life plan. So much has happened over the past couple of years, and more recently this past year, I have made a lot of discoveries about my self, and never did I think I would become a poet, blogger, and an entrepreneur, yes soon I will be  selling hair, I don't have any one me, but I am in the middle of great business plan. I have always wanted to own my own business, but never knew what steps to take, how to make them happen, but I have a huge network that it's impossible to think it cannot work. It can and it will.
I will do my best to show you the new places I check out, outfits, things I discover, and share my journey with you. I'm a few days behind, but I am working on confidence with every outfit and learning to be sexy and love my body. No more cute and adorable, it's time to become the grown and sexy woman I know I am, and remind everyone that I am not a little girl anymore...I am growing up and I hope that you can all take this journey with me. :)

I'm excited, a little nervous, I am also hoping to be able to meet new people, and try new event that I have never considered before...Being different and stepping outside of my box. You should try it.
I also want to point out an event at Saint Mary's University on the 24th of November...From 8-11pm, I am one of the poets, and will be showcasing my lovely work, a poem I wrote and a duet poem a friend and I will perform together at the Gorsebrook. It's on campus, its by donation, funds will go to the Watoto Children's Choir so I urge all to go and check it out...And support local and incredible poetic talent. For more info, (although that is pretty much it, check out the link below.

https://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=217220615012758
Bring friends and family, and an open mind to hear some great people speak.

Signed:
GyftedArtyst

InterestingLinks

So...I was going to blog about how little sleep I got last night, but I decided to blog about some links I came across today which I found very helpful, and will use in my own personal use...And later, will share if I have any success with either or all of them...What on earth am I talking about?????

I have always been an avid Essence reader. I would buy every magazine until I decided to save some $$$ and just go online. If it wasn't online, than I'd buy the magazine.
Here are some links I came across today:

http://www.essence.com/2011/10/25/modern-day-matchmaker-how-to-tell-if-youre-dating-a-man-or-a-boy/

http://www.essence.com/2011/10/18/modern-day-matchmaker-9-things-you-didnt-know-about-black-love/

http://www.essence.com/2011/11/01/modern-day-matchmaker-the-secret-to-finding-your-idris-or-denzel/

http://www.essence.com/2011/10/12/girls-best-friend-you-need-a-love-to-do-list/

http://www.essence.com/2011/10/11/modern-day-matchmaker-10-pick-up-lines-hell-go-for/

Enjoy and share your thoughts.

Signed:
GyftedArtyst