http://www.essence.com/2011/11/17/real-talk-tyrese-says-you-need-a-man/
So....Black ...women are in this conversation more than any other race that I know of...That I have read of. You see, Black women do love their Black men, but we have a very big communication problem. Black women would prefer that their man come already trained to help out in the kitchen, help around the house, pick up the kids, contribute, and eventually, marry the woman they have shared a few years with. Instead, we have Black couples divorcing after such a short period of time. Divorcing after a year or two, and all we can ask is, "Why go through with it knowing it's for life, and your not sure?" Eva Longoria married Tony Parker and they divorced, but he did cheat. However, vows do say through thick and thin. I'm not saying forgive him right away, but he has to know he did wrong, pay for it, and find a way to gain your trust back. For celebrities its worse. Now a days the B-ball players just want to have fun, they don't care if they are married or not. The wives know what they are getting into. It's all about the money in the end. Whether they fight the press about it for years, we know money is the reason most B-ball players find those wives who just want access into clubs, booze, and to be flown all over the world wearing hideous looking clothes they think are gorgeous. But the real deal is within our own people. A good Black woman will show her man she appreciates him. But the Black man needs to stop being pampered 24/7 and pamper her back. Your wife does NOT replace your mother. You need to get that out if your head. Be the man, you have a job to, and its more than to just bring home the bacon. Dating outside the race has always been a problem, but now the topic is just out of hand. Movies such as "Something New" Which showed that no matter how for you are for your own man, he could be successful, gorgeous, have it all, but he could be boring as anything and just want to be at home and work. That is boring. So she went for the White guy because he made her laugh, smile, and was outgoing. People stared, and whispered, but who cares???????? Why do us girls, Black girls care so much about what people think about us? Do they pay your bills? They are just jealous because you found a good man who will honor you for life. Nobody else matters except for the people you pick. Family will always support you even if they do not like the choice you make. It's their job to stand behind you because in the end, all family want is for you to be happy.
Now I kinda went a bit off track, so to come back to my title...Women have leaned on men for decades until we were given rights to vote, work, and do other things. Now, we want to be independent, bu the man wants us to lean on him. It can get messy but if you just sit and talk things out with your spouse, it's not as hard as you make it out to be. Honesty is a good policy. If you do not learn to trust in you relationship, you will struggle with everything else and life is too short. Let him spoil you, let him treat you, no harm in that. But talk about things in a calm and respectful manner without yelling and trying to hurt each other.
Loving is so important yet this world would rather us kill each other. Let's not do that. Treasure life, communicate in a decent manner, and learn to be open, kind, and respectful.
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
