Would you wait for a man to grow up and be a man before marrying him?
Confused, let me explain, would you be with someone for a long time, knowing that marriage is on your mind, not his, and still stay with him until he is ready?
It's asking a lot of a woman to give up what she deserves just because a man is either "scared" or "not there yet" which is kinda like being scared. Ive read articles about women that waited over ten years to be married to a man who "just wasn't there yet" and honestly, it's not easy. My older sister was with her now husband for 6.5-7 years. They knew each other growing up, but nothing happened until years later. They have been married for two years but at the time, most of the relationship was long distance, but he moved home, and the rest is history.
It takes men a while to really get a grip on where they are in life. To men, it's more than just about the paper coming in, it's about stability, financially, emotionally, mentally, environmentally, physically, and how much ambition he has to accomplish his goals, or how depressed he is with how the world is changing and he just hasn't caught up yet and instead of being the "man he was" he goes to the 'coach potato, with no hope and no future." Would you give up or keep pushing?
Anyway, I see these people in relationships longer than five years and I wonder, how do you do it? is marriage an option or it's been so long that you just never thought about it? I can't speak on this issue personally but I wonder if love was enough to keep me with a man for years and not be married.
We all know men need the extra push. It's important for men to have the "I'm a man feel" You cannot, and should not take that from a man. It isn't right, but it happens because women feel they can control a man...in a way yes..But not to go off track...Never speak on what you have not gone through. So I wont say how I feel, it's more of a question for women that have waited, or women that are waiting...
Well, guess we will have to wait and see what the future holds.
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Monday, August 15, 2011
Have You Ever????
Have you ever had a conversation with someone that made you really see just the type of person that you are? Good or bad?
I have been in the position for the first time, and it did not feel good.
I am always told my friends and family just how smart beautiful, and that any guy who picks me would be the luckiest guy in the world. I've heard it enough times to want to cry, but I realize now more than ever, that settling for less than what you deserve, is not right, and despite the hardships that life has us go through, whether we lose a best friend, or our parents get divorced, or we move to a new city and have to make new friends every few years, whatever we deal with, we do not go through the process alone. I have an amazing family, that has given me the utmost support. They have given me pep talks on love, friends, family, etc, and continue to remind me that everything in life takes time, and that rushing into stuff will only cause harm. I am a very determined person, dedicated, and passionate about life. Only when times have been tough, I have shown less happiness because it is hard to smile when you are feeling down. But, I am a firm believer that things will turn around. I know this because I have seen the miracles in my family, and I know that we would not be the people that we are without God and the support of the community.
I wake up some day wondering, when will I get my big break, when will I finally see my name in lights, when will the rest of my goals be achieved, and as I think about it now, my dreams will only happen if I stay focused and do not lose sight of what matters and what is important.
In a conversation that I had with a friend, I was told that men are intimidated by independence and smarts. I explained the one thing that I am afraid of and that is not being enough because of my education. I never finished university, and never knew growing up what I wanted to do. I never had a plan, and felt in conversations that I had nothing to offer. Besides my writing, I have always felt a bit inadequate and never quite knew how to handle it, however, the things I have accomplished, big or small, people see the real me, my actions have shaped my character and helped me to see things in a different light.
You can be told all your life how great you are, how incredible your writing is, but unless you feel it deep down inside, than you will not convince anyone.
The reason for this blog was to allow me to see that sometimes you are too good for someone, but it should be motivation to better you and not make the other person feel bad. It might seem that way, but I am learning to turn a negative into a positive.
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
I have been in the position for the first time, and it did not feel good.
I am always told my friends and family just how smart beautiful, and that any guy who picks me would be the luckiest guy in the world. I've heard it enough times to want to cry, but I realize now more than ever, that settling for less than what you deserve, is not right, and despite the hardships that life has us go through, whether we lose a best friend, or our parents get divorced, or we move to a new city and have to make new friends every few years, whatever we deal with, we do not go through the process alone. I have an amazing family, that has given me the utmost support. They have given me pep talks on love, friends, family, etc, and continue to remind me that everything in life takes time, and that rushing into stuff will only cause harm. I am a very determined person, dedicated, and passionate about life. Only when times have been tough, I have shown less happiness because it is hard to smile when you are feeling down. But, I am a firm believer that things will turn around. I know this because I have seen the miracles in my family, and I know that we would not be the people that we are without God and the support of the community.
I wake up some day wondering, when will I get my big break, when will I finally see my name in lights, when will the rest of my goals be achieved, and as I think about it now, my dreams will only happen if I stay focused and do not lose sight of what matters and what is important.
In a conversation that I had with a friend, I was told that men are intimidated by independence and smarts. I explained the one thing that I am afraid of and that is not being enough because of my education. I never finished university, and never knew growing up what I wanted to do. I never had a plan, and felt in conversations that I had nothing to offer. Besides my writing, I have always felt a bit inadequate and never quite knew how to handle it, however, the things I have accomplished, big or small, people see the real me, my actions have shaped my character and helped me to see things in a different light.
You can be told all your life how great you are, how incredible your writing is, but unless you feel it deep down inside, than you will not convince anyone.
The reason for this blog was to allow me to see that sometimes you are too good for someone, but it should be motivation to better you and not make the other person feel bad. It might seem that way, but I am learning to turn a negative into a positive.
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
I Was There
I threw this together some time back, and now just finished it...Let me know your thoughts
I was the girl that people walked past
I was the girl that was ignored
I was the girl that you thought about, looked at, and talked about, but never spoke to
And you wonder why I eyed you the way I did
It's because you treated me the way you did
Why should I give you my time
When you don't even think I am worth a dime?
You act like a man but you speak like a child
And you wonder why a woman like me now, would go for a man like him?
It' because he sees the woman I am, and the woman I can be
He does not choose when to use me, and when to abuse me
He chooses when to love me, cherish me, and hold me
He chooses to make me smile, wipe my tears and comfort me when I sigh
He chooses to stand by me, defend me, and help me fight my battles
But you, preferred to fight against me, and watch me fall alone, with no hope of getting back up
He choose to challenge me, but not act better than me, he chose to help me, and to love me
You chose to fight me, and harm me, not protect me, And
while you chose to be that way, I chose a man who learned to say, "I love you" with his actions, thoughts, and his personality
I hope you learned your lesson, to never let something great go
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
I was the girl that people walked past
I was the girl that was ignored
I was the girl that you thought about, looked at, and talked about, but never spoke to
And you wonder why I eyed you the way I did
It's because you treated me the way you did
Why should I give you my time
When you don't even think I am worth a dime?
You act like a man but you speak like a child
And you wonder why a woman like me now, would go for a man like him?
It' because he sees the woman I am, and the woman I can be
He does not choose when to use me, and when to abuse me
He chooses when to love me, cherish me, and hold me
He chooses to make me smile, wipe my tears and comfort me when I sigh
He chooses to stand by me, defend me, and help me fight my battles
But you, preferred to fight against me, and watch me fall alone, with no hope of getting back up
He choose to challenge me, but not act better than me, he chose to help me, and to love me
You chose to fight me, and harm me, not protect me, And
while you chose to be that way, I chose a man who learned to say, "I love you" with his actions, thoughts, and his personality
I hope you learned your lesson, to never let something great go
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
Sunday, August 14, 2011
How To Be A Man Vs. Be Who You Are
http://iamboigenius.com/boris-kodjoe-schools-twitter-on-how-to-be-a-man/
I really won't say much but I thought that this was really neat, and encourage men to take a look, and share your thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
I really won't say much but I thought that this was really neat, and encourage men to take a look, and share your thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Signed:
GyftedArtyst
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